Okay, I'm gonna see how much of this entry I can get done in the next 15 minutes or so.

First off, we've got an Earl Pitts recap for Wednesday and Thursday.

Wednesday

You know what makes me sick? You know what makes me angry? (He always starts off like that.) Cupid. I'd like to pluck off his wings, and kick his butt.

My daughter is getting married. And so my little girl and my wife are buried in Bride magazines. They only come up for air, and for Christmas. And I'm stuck planning a reception. But they don't LIKE any of my ideas. And of course, I'm footing the bill.

So I don't feel like I'm losing a daughter. I'm losing a daughter, a bank account, my 401K, and any chance of retirement in this lifetime.

WAKE UP AMERICA!

Thursday

Now that I've got my own radio show, I'm famous. And so I attract women like flies on dog poop. But with that celebrity is a price. Psychos come out of the woodwork at you.

And so now I've got a stalker. I was at the bowling alley, and she came up to me wearing one of those skimpy outfits, asking if there's anything I want. She flashes a smile, and bats her eyes at me. Now she did this like three days in a row. Each time, she asked me if I see anything I want. And each time the outfits get skimpier and skimpier. Now by the third day, I was thinking to myself, yeah, I'll take ya out back.

But I did the smart thing. I called the cops, and told them I had a stalker. When they showed up, she had a story ready. She told them she was the barmaid. They believed her.

WAKE UP AMERICA!

I saw a scary sight today while driving around at work. There was a 70 year old woman hitchhiking on the side of the road. And so now I've seen EVERYTHING.

Tonight was the start of my "Break Something" music phase. On the way to and from work, I was cranking the decibels WAY up. And I was playing songs like Nine Inch Nails "Head Like a Hole" and "Down In It", Marilyn Manson's CD Anti-Christ Superstar, and I wish I had some Korn to go with it.

I was going to add some depressing stuff to this entry, but I figure there's always time for that later. We'll deal with the psycho music stuff for tonight. And I'll leave it with this bit of advice...

"Be excellent to each other... and Party on Dudes!"

Night all!